~~ vida haifeña ~~

welcome to the world, alma june!

2007-11-27T17:14:00.000+02:00

~*~ alma june wallace was born in the early morning hours of november 27, 2007 ~*~

welcome to the world, baby cousin!

just a few days after akeva paz' first year birthday!

californ-eye-ay

2007-08-24T18:48:00.000+03:00

so, after yet another long pause in blogging, here are some photos for your enjoyment :)

we're visiting my family in california, and although we forgot the camera on all the important days (like akeva's first dip in the ocean!- so cute!), here are some everyday activities...

she's learning to wave :) and yes, those are SEVEN teeth in her mouth!

standing up and playing...

baths in the sink are the best :)

snoozin'....

for more photos...

2007-07-24T22:04:00.000+03:00

i am the WORST blogger... absolutely no updates! but fortunately my sister samantha has taken charge of making sure akeva's growth spurts are well documented :) check out her blog for recent pics!

a long time coming!

2007-06-25T02:00:00.000+03:00

it's been almost three months since i last posted photos, and a lot has happened since then!

akeva has grown two itsy bitsy teeth, a good sign that she's ready to eat "real" food...

which should always match her outfit ;) stylish girl that she is!

she's also learning to swim:

after a week of lessons, she's ready to go under the water, which is scary for me but fun for her:

i'll try to post more often :) promise!

happy naw-ruz!

2007-03-21T06:16:00.000+02:00

~*~ all dressed up in african garb for the new year ~*~

tonight was the turkeyville naw-ruz party, and i decided to make akevita a little african dress out of one of my headwraps... it came out really cute, but i should admit that i am a horrible seamstress and that the first version i made came out waay too small, so i had to add little panels on the side in order to get her in it... and then, once we got to the party, it started coming apart at the seams! ha! luckily, akeva is just sweet enough and small enough to pull off that raggedy look in style :)

at long last...

2007-03-09T01:55:00.000+02:00

a new post!

we've been moving into a new apartment for the last... i don't know... forever? seems like it anyway. moving is no fun and i don't recommend it, ever. just stay put is what i say! and periodically throw away all junk, so you don't end up with a ton of it... it seems to multiply on its own, so be careful...

once we're actually finished moving, i may post photos of the finished product... but seeing the rate our putting-things-away seems to be going, that may never happen...

akeva is growing and learning all sorts of new things... she is now a professional thumb-sucker and has even managed to roll over... she "talks" all the time, especially if i'm on the phone with someone, or if i'm listening to something with a lot of talking... tis very cute :)

for sammy :)

2007-02-18T02:23:00.001+02:00

here's your sobrinita in her pinguino shirt-- and, for once, not staring at the camera as if it were an alien about to abduct her!

so excited!

2007-02-13T04:58:00.000+02:00

here's a little laughter (which turns to serious contemplation) from akeva :)

(it should work now!)

~~ pancho ~~

2007-02-12T22:08:00.000+02:00

ayer hubieras cumplido 34 an~os... y hubieramos celebrado juntos, disfrutando del dia, y te hubiera dicho... "vieeeeejoo..."

es tan extran~o celebrar estos aniversarios, o mejor dicho, notar estos aniversarios... no se que hacer en estos dias, si estar feliz o triste, como recordarte de la manera mas apropriada, mas digna... ser tu viuda ha sido la experiencia mas dificil de mi vida, y seguira siendola...

pero

te sigo queriendo, porque fuiste, y eres, mi amor. pocos de los que visitan este sitio te conocieron... no conocieron tu risa contagiosa, que fuiste picaro total, que tus ojos brillaban cada vez que se te occurria una travesura... que tenias una voz tan profunda y hipnotizante, que son~abas con crear musica, que fuiste poeta. no supieron de tu magia, de tu manera de saber los secretos mas intimos de todos sin que ellos te dijeran nada... de tus man~as, tus silencios, tus locuras. te extran~o demasiado, y aunque han pasado tantos an~os, todavia espero que vas a aparecer en algun lugar, inesperadamente, con una sonrisa y con tus ojos brillando... con un piropo y un beso, que todo fue una ilusion...

pero

si fuese asi, la vida que tengo ahora, mi esposo, mi hijita preciosa, serian una ilusion tambien... asi que vuelvo a la realidad y te agradezco tu generosidad, que como mi angel guardian me has guiado hacia una vida tan plena, que sigues en mi vida, simplemente con otra forma, con otra realidad.

te amo, pancho, siempre.

feliz cumplean~os.

hmm...

2007-01-28T02:09:00.000+02:00

here i was, trying to take one of those sweet "mama and child" photos, full of love and tendernes... but you can see very clearly what akeva thinks of cheesy posed pictures... jejejeje! ;)

p.s. aria, who has already proven many times over that she is much much better at this photo-taking/blogging thing, has posted some more pics of akeva-- check them out!

all smiles :D

2007-01-22T20:15:00.000+02:00

managed to catch her in the act :)
she's smiling a lot now, but trying to get a smile on camera is quite a task! ;)

photos, finally

2007-01-17T19:45:00.000+02:00

akeva and i went a-visitin' yesterday and aria took a bunch of photos of the cutenesses :)
check it out!

a baby story

2007-01-05T05:09:00.000+02:00

akeva is deeply asleep in patrik's arms right now, so i think i have a few minutes to tell the story of her birth :) she's been with us for six weeks now, and is growing like crazy, changing every day... i wish i had fresh photos to show, but our camera's batteries died (and going to the store is a major excursion these days! as is doing the dishes... jejeje) and our new computer (thank you philip! free computer at home is an AMAZING thing!) doesn't recognize our photo card reader... so i am still trying to figure out the whole photo thing... but, on to the story :)

at about three in the morning on wednesday, november 22, i woke up to pee (as i did several times every night during the last months of pregnancy) and began feeling waves of contractions coming every few minutes. i was so excited to be in labor, but feeling a little tentative since i had been having "false labor" every few days, so i went to bed and barely whispered to patrik that i thought i might be in labor... at that point the contractions really just felt like waves that would build up and die down, and i rode them with a big ol' smile on my face, so so so so so so so excited... after a couple hours of that, i decided i should call my mother so she could get on a plane and be with me in time for the delivery and then called my midwife to give her a heads-up that my labor had started... she told me to try to rest a little since it was still the middle of the night, and mentioned that she was just heading home after another woman's delivery... at around ten in the morning the midwife came over to the house to check me and saw that i was still just in the earliest part of my labor, so we decided she should head back home and sleep since she had been up all night with her other client, and i kept on laboring... my mom showed up around noon, having caught the last available seat on a plane on thanksgiving weekend, and joined my sister samantha (who just happened to be in town) in sending me happy thoughts as i rode through the contractions... aria also came to the house to join the party :) at around three in the afternoon (so that's 12 hours of labor, for anyone who might be counting!) the midwife came back to the house after her little rest and checked me out... at that point i was at about 6 centimeters and my labor was getting stronger... but kept "pausing"... i don't quite know how to explain it or know why it was happening, but i would get really good strong contractions, right on top of each other, and then my body would go into relaxation mode and i would stop getting very strong contractions... i was even able to sleep and rest, which was nice for me, but which slowed down my labor quite a bit. luckily my midwife was very patient and while i rested she took little naps as well or just visited with my family (at one point, i even think they all played a scrabble game! shows how mellow it was at the house... hehehe)

throughout my labor, patrik was amazing... luckily the gardens department in haifa and then working in landscaping here has kept him strong because i swear he carried me throughout the entire twenty-some hours... i kept leaning on him, or hanging on his arms as i squatted down, or having him hold me in the shower as i tried to let the water relax me... and at one point (maybe while i was sleeping?), he managed to go out and get a bunch of flowers and filled the bedroom with them... so when i was feeling the strongest contractions, i looked up and saw all these beautiful flowers that seemed to have appeared magically...

all this lasted about 24 hours before the exciting (and scary) part of it happened... in the middle of the next night, i started having very painful back labor, so the midwife gave me a series of shots in my back of distilled water... there's something about the balance of water in your body that makes injecting pure water into it take away pain (i'm sure there's a much more scientific way of putting that)... BUT before it takes away the pain it causes the MOST EXTREME pain EVER for about a minute... needless to say, that minute lasts an eternity... i screamed like crazy for the first and only time during labor when she gave me that series of shots... but it allowed me to not feel the pain of back labor for a few hours, which was a great relief... then, at about three in the morning, the back labor came back, and the only thing i could think of to do (since i was NOT going to get those shots again... EVER) was to try to get the baby to move... so i concentrated as hard as i could and centered my thoughts on akeva, telling her to please turn around so that she would be in the correct position... and suddenly, i felt her move and the pain was gone... it was an amazing feeling to be connected to her in that way...

but then, the midwife checked the baby's heartrate and it had gone WAY down after she turned... she thought maybe the baby was in distress, so she called 911 to transfer me to a hospital... i have never felt more terrified in my life then when i thought there was a possibility that something was wrong... the tears started coming and i started praying and then started begging pancho to help me from the next world... suddenly the house was full of people-- paramedics, police, firemen... it felt like 50 people had responded to the 911 call, all asking me questions and trying to get me on a stretcher in order to go to the hospital in the ambulance... plus my mom and sam and mary lou (the midwife) all trying to figure out the logistics of how to get to the hospital, and patrik holding my hand looking terrified too... eventually i got into the ambulance and we bumped and banged all the way to the hospital (ambulances really should have better shock systems... hmph) ... i was wheeled to the delivery room, where i was hooked up to all sorts of machines and given an IV for dehydration, and after what seemed like half an hour (but i'm sure was longer), i pushed out a tiny little creature :)

pushing was such a relief after all the contractions... being able to DO something and feel a release of pressure is wonderful after so many hours of feeling like you have no control over your body... yum.

akeva came out hungry hungry hungry, and even started sucking on teh midwife's finger when just her head had come out and i was getting ready to push the rest of her out... after being born she was put on a table near me where they made sure she wasn't in distress and where patrik got to cut the umbilical cord... and then they brought me this little bundle with big big eyes wide open and a tiny little mouth ready to eat... she began eating immediately and didn't let go until we had to move to the recovery room a few hours later :) and she still LOVES to eat :)

my midwife keeps asking if i'm happy with how the birth turned out, since it was so different than what i had planned or ever imagined... and although i still want to experience having a baby at home in water, i am so happy that she is healthy and that the hospital staff was able to help us... it ended up that she probably would have been fine being born at home, since her heart rate went right back up to normal immediately and she hadn't swallowed any meconium, but i'm glad we played it safe... and it was nice to see what a hospital birth is like, and to notice what i appreciated and what i felt could have been improved in the hospital, if any day i end up working in one as a midwife... i have to say, they have some cool "toys", like this bar they put on the bed for you to brace your legs against as your push, or the beds that recline and sit up, which make nursing so much easier :)

and now we have this perfect little baby girl... :)

new pics :)

2007-01-02T05:57:00.000+02:00

it's been almost a month since my last post! eek! life with baby means no free hands for typing... that's my excuse and i'm sticking to it ;) but patrik is holding her right now, so i'm taking advantage of the opportunity to catch up a little...

akeva is growing like crazy and getting more beautiful every day... she's starting to figure out how to smile back and is very alert... when she's awake :) and because i've started to get threatening emails about how i never post pictures of her, here are some from my sister's wedding:

she slept soundly for all the photos... but cried like a maniac during the entire ceremony!

as the tiniest bridesmaid, i had to make sure she matched the bride's color scheme...

~*~

we've been in california for about a week now and are flying back to albuquerque tomorrow, if'n there's no snow... i guess there was a big storm a couple days ago, so we had to stay in LA a little longer than planned. the wedding was a big family reunion (and our family is now much much bigger and louder and funner thanks to the addition of my sister's new stepsons-- check out her blog for more info)... here's a pic of us three sisters and the now-complete set of brothers-in-law... diverse group, eh? ;)

and here's my favorite moment from the wedding... sergio making samantha (and everyone else present) weep with his sweet words about how much he cares for her :*)

~~ joyful news ~~

2006-12-01T21:56:00.000+02:00

patrik and i are overjoyed to share the news

of the birth into this world of

akeva paz nkouaga

born on thursday 23 november 2006

just before sunrise

~*~

...thank you for all your prayers and warm wishes...

so i guess people do check this blog... :D

2006-11-16T22:25:00.000+02:00

my friend aria recently put this "sitemeter" thingy on the bottom of my blog, which lets me know how many people visit the site and where they are checking from (there's even someone from japan- adri?) it's all very cool and high-tech, and also makes me feel incredibly guilty that people are checking to see if i've written ANYTHING and of course, i haven't! eek!

so, here goes another update! :)

this is how i feel lately, feeling very round and moon-goddessy, baby growing and growing and me waiting and waiting...

i'm hoping the baby comes soon, since i'm so anxious to meet her and see who she is and figure out how to be a mama! but so far she seems pretty content to just keep swishing around inside me, staying warm and squeezing my internal organs :) i guess the womb is a pretty cushy place, but i keep trying to convince her to come see this world ~ hopefully she'll become intrigued enough pretty soon!

i've been getting the house ready for the birth, setting up the birthing tub, getting everything ready for the baby... luckily friends have been incredibly generous with baby things, and so many have had babies recently and happen to have so much STUFF that normally costs so much money that they're letting me use or keep... it's weird to be in the states, where it seems you need STUFF for everything you do, and having a baby is no exception... when i went to register for baby gifts (also a very US thing to do), the list of things that the store gave me as "necessary" was a whole little book, and when i finished scanning all the cute little items that i though i could ever need or want, they printed out a list of "things you can't do without that you haven't registered for"... it just seems so strange that such a little creature should need so many huge things... and that around the world women are having babies and raising them fine without all this stuff... hmm. but, being here, our house has slowly started filling up with all sorts of trinkets for the baby, some which are pretty cool, i have to admit. like a crib that attaches to our bed so that the baby is sleeping with us, but without being in the path of drowsy arms and legs, or all sorts of slings and things for carrying the baby, or the "hooterhider" my sister sent so i can nurse in public without offending or shocking anyone with them hooters of mine :)

but now the house is ready for the baby, patrik and i are ready for the baby, my mom is ready, just a phone call away in order to get on a plane to be here when the baby comes... just waiting for the baby to be ready :) soon, i hope...

~*~

2006-10-27T22:56:00.000+02:00

here i am again, with no photos... teehee!

today my midwife came by to help get our house ready for the birth :) so exciting! she brought by the birthing tub and explained how to set it up and how to fill it and everything, and did her normal examination of my belly (baby is doing great, which is always nice to hear!) and then we just talked and talked about midwifery and how to pursue it as a calling, and how it's affected her life... twas a nice visit :)

not much else is new around here... patrik has been at his new job for about a week now, and even though it's really long hours doing hard manual labour, he's happy and liking it :) he comes home EXHAUSTED every day though! such a difference from the two months we've spent sitting around the house doing not much of anything! (which, by the way, is still what my day consists of... nada nada nada... just growing a baby and watching too much tv...)

pics of belly

2006-10-16T20:46:00.000+02:00

halo all :)

i'm a-growin' and a-growin', and though i haven't figured out how to upload photos onto my blog from here, my friend aria has some photos of my ever-increasing girth on her blog... check it out if'n you like!

all is well here, still job hunting for patrik and getting the house ready for a mini-family reunion this weekend... my mom and grandmother and sister and sister's fiancee and sister's fiancee's son will be visiting albuquerque this weekend (and we're having a baby shower to celebrate! woohoo!) so we'll have a full house... but that's the best type of house, isn't it? :)

i'm missing haifa a lot lately, so any emails from all you bwc'ers would be great! i don't have anyone's address (i got in the habit of having outlook just automatically filling them in at work, so now i have NO idea what anyone's address is...) but here's mine: snugglylion@yahoo.com...

big hugs!

i'm becoming terrible at this...

2006-10-03T23:18:00.000+02:00

i doubt anyone ever looks at this blog anymore, but i thought i'd update anyway... :)

still no photos (sorry-- no computer at home and i have NO idea how to download photos at the public library without them being saved to the harddrive for random people to look at... scaaaaarry...), but one of these days i'll figure out a way... i know there's a couple of folks anxious to see my ever-growing belly (it's HUGE!) and we just moved into a new house which i'm pretty sure my mamita wants photos of too...

we are now officially living in albuquerque, new mexico, renting a cute little house from my future brother-in-law, which is perfect cuz it's completely furnished so we don't have to go out and buy a bunch of stuff... patrik is looking for work and i'm enjoying a ridiculous amount of leisure time... growing a baby has made me incredibly lazy... hehehe...

we've gone to a couple of baha'i activities since we got here, and it's so nice for me to see everyone again, and to see the amount of change that has occured in the mindset of the community... being away for a year and a half lets me see the growth spurt that has taken place, and appreciate how different things are! so exciting!

anyway, that's about it (really! we're not doing much...)-- i'll try to post more often...

much love...

~~ finally, a new post ~~

2006-09-07T04:55:00.001+03:00

general updates on our life... let's see...

i am beyond pregnant... belly growing and growing, baby dancing and dancing, me waddling and waddling more and more... ! so excited, actually :) it's a bizarre wonderful feeling to grow a tiny little person inside me-- highly recommend it!

we've been in the states for a few weeks now, missing the holy land a lot, but slowly getting used to this new place... we've been living with my parents and grandmother in southern california (near the beach, which is lovely... went today and was quite refreshing!) and enjoying a vacationish lifestyle... sleeping late, lounging around a lot, eating well... happysigh.

we'll be moving to albuquerque, new mexico in about a week and a half... yay! we went to visit a couple weeks ago (click on aria's link to see photos of our visit) and felt much more at home there than in LA, so off we go!

that's about it, actually... !

safe and sound...

2006-08-18T03:28:00.000+03:00

just a little note that we arrived safely in california a few days ago, have been sleeping and relaxing ever since!
more later...

leaving sooner...

2006-08-11T07:46:00.000+03:00

so, change in plans... patrik was able to go pick up his passport yesterday afternoon, so we decided to leave a few days earlier. we'll be leaving early sunday morning for LA, rather than wednesday. ... so last night we did some wickedquick cleaning of the flat and final packing, and today is our last day at work... tomorrow we'll just relax and try to spend as much time at the shrines as possible, and then... we're off. it's a strange strange feeling to be leaving, i gotta say. exciting, but sad.

smooth sailing from here on out (i hope!)

2006-08-09T09:12:00.000+03:00

our trip to tel aviv yesterday was successful! patrik's visa was approved, so now we are just waiting to hear back from the embassy about when we can go pick up his passport (hmm... it seems throughout all this it has been "and now we are just waiting for [fill in the blank]"...) it seems, though, that everything is going smoothly... we have reservations for a flight to los angeles early next week, though we might have to change the date if anything gets delayed with the passport. keep those fingers crossed...

scary night ~ happy morning

2006-08-07T11:54:00.000+03:00

yeah... so last night a rocket hit directly across the street from us.

VERY loud.

VERY scary.

i cried.

lots more rockets kept falling in the city, making it seem like the world was falling apart. but then, it was quiet, and we counted all our fingers and toes and baby bumps and everything was accounted for.

we're ok.

we're safe.

we slept soundly afterwards.

~*~

and so then this morning, a happy suprise... the embassy called us (yes! and not the other way around! it's a MIRACLE!) and said they have the paper they needed in hand so we can go tomorrow to finish up our paperwork!

VERY exciting.

VERY relieving.

i did a happy dance.

it's looking promising at the moment and i will write more tomorrow about how it goes... hopefully all will be well and we can travel soon.

we're happy.

we're cautiously excited.

we will most definitely sleep soundly tonight.

~~ sending you a birthday wish ~~

2006-08-06T16:04:00.000+03:00

happy birthday sweet samita!

...wish i was there with you...

hope you had a marvelous day!!!

i love fridays...

2006-08-04T10:30:00.000+03:00

cuz it means only a half day of work :) yup, i am the essence of laziness as the week wears on...

our big plans for the weekend? more staying home with the occasional movie and some more half-packing... but i'm also looking forward to reading a book i'm half-way through... :)

here's hoping we have some visa news next week!

back to routine?

2006-08-02T17:34:00.000+03:00

after a couple days of quiet, the sirens have returned today...

but just a quick note for those who check in-- we're doing fine :)

getting nowhere slowly?

2006-08-01T10:05:00.000+03:00

yesterday we got some news for our visa process... not quite the exciting "coming soon" type of news we were expecting, but news nonetheless. the document we need from the israeli police will be sent on thursday of this week to the embassy, meaning it should arrive by monday or tuesday of next week at the embassy... meaning maybe on wednesday we can go to the embassy to finish up the paperwork?... it's all still veeeeeery iffy, since the isreali week (sunday thru friday) versus the embassy week (monday through thursday mornings) leaves very little common time for things to take place. all still very vague. but, best case scenario, if the document manages to get to the embassy by early next week and we get there and verify that our file is complete, the visa should be issued by the 14th or 15th... wost case scenario? the police certificate gets lost for the third time and we are out of luck (and out of all our big bucks paid to the embassy in application fees)...
getting this "news" yesterday afternoon left me in a little bit of a funk and once again very frustrated.. but then, patrik and i went to say some prayers, and it was soo good. a total shift in focus... we get to stay here serving for at least two more weeks, at a time when both our departments really need us to be around... and that's why we came here in the first place, to serve, and were initially wanting to stay for much longer, so now that we've been given a couple more weeks to do what we came to do, we should look at it as a good thing, not as a frustrating one... and the rockets... well, they've become part of our routine... yesterday there were no airraid sirens at all, and to tell you the truth, i think it freaked me out more than having the sirens go off all day... will i ever get used to peace and quiet again? ;)
so, at least two more weeks in the holy land, maybe three... and by late next week we'll know something... we hope!

life in limbo

2006-07-30T17:13:00.000+03:00

it's interesting to be somewhere that you know you're leaving soon but you just don't know when... our flat is kind of chaotic at the moment, with a lot of half-packing going on... we managed to pack two suitcases of clothes and random things we know we will not be needing any time soon, as well as a box of books to ship to wherever it is we end up. these are sitting, quite plumply, in our living room... we've also tried to get everything that was hiding in drawers and closets out in the open so that we know exactly how much stuff we need to pack or give away or sell or toss out the window... but that of course has led only to a huge mess on our dining room table (our only table, i should add...) that stares at us and which by now we have lost all desire to do anything about... funny how having all the time in the world just breeds laziness... also, we've made arrangements to sell some of our stuff, like the large assortment of jungley plants that i've collected since coming here, and our tv/vcr... but are feeling a little reluctant to actually deliver the goods to the buyers since we could still be here for several more weeks, and it's no fun to live in a plant-less, entertainment-less flat, especially when you have to stay inside all the time cuz they're rockets falling out of the sky...
...BUT...
it's also satisfying to do something, anything at all, that seems to be pushing us forward on our plans to head home... right now all visa paperwork is entirely out of our hands, and there isn't even any fancy string-pulling we can do to rush it... so slowly packing our things with the hope that we will soon be getting on a plane is our one satisfying task! :)
so tonight, back to half-packing our stuff... hopefully without the background music of airraid sirens :)

weekend update

2006-07-28T12:01:00.000+03:00

off to yet another quiet (hopefully) weekend at home :)

won't be doing much, so if you want to call and chat... hint. hint. ;)

quiet day...

2006-07-27T17:03:00.000+03:00

... but still left me quite sleepy, so i'm heading home for what will hopefully be a quiet evening...

will blog more tomorrow...

all is well

2006-07-26T17:22:00.000+03:00

so here's another post to let everyone who checks in to see that we're okay-- we're okay :)

somehow the airraid sirens have become a "normal" part of our day? how weird is that? even weirder is how i'm more worried about patrik's visa not being ready yet than i am about being hit by rockets... !

tomorrow was supposed to be our last day of work, but since we still have no idea when patrik's visa will be ready, we're just going to keep on coming in to work til we hear something... i wish we had a date, even a tentative one, for our departure. (tee hee... patrik's department threw him a farewell gettogether this afternoon anyway... watch us not leave for another month!)

it seems we just have to be patient, as the one document we need for the visa is completely out of our hands... let's just hope it doesn't get "misplaced" by the embassy a third time!!! so here's to learning patience... and to finding tranquility even among rockets dropping from the sky...

no, really, we're fine

2006-07-19T15:40:00.000+03:00

yup, there's lots of sirens and booms all day long, some which kind of stop my heart for a few seconds, but then i just take a deep breath and keep on living life. as the days go on, it gets less scary but more worrisome... other than the slightly more tense shoulders than usual, we're doing fine ...

...thanks for everyone's prayers and happy thoughts being sent to this side of the world...

all is well

2006-07-17T08:33:00.000+03:00

just wanted to let you all know everything is ok and that we are all fine :)

paz.... paciencia...

2006-07-13T16:56:00.000+03:00

calmer about visa situation now :)

not necessarily because there is any indication it will all work out well, though! hehe

first, i talked to my mamita, who can always relax me :)

second, yesterday afternoon patrik and i went to go meet with mrs. ndegwa, a counsellor from kenya, to tell her the news of our leaving and ask her for advice (and yes, managed to vent a little about the trip to tel aviv too...) ~ it was such a nice conversation, she was so loving and had all these wonderful stories and advice and was just so sure of God's hand in all of this that we left her office with such a burden lifted off our shoulders, so much lighter, and no longer anxious and tense... we still have a lot to do and a lot to take care of, but whatever happens, it will be ok.

third, from the meeting we went to the shrines (how i'll miss the shrines...)

fourth, we spoke with patrik's parents last night, and they were also so loving and joyful that it was hard not to be smile too... :)

burocracia is burocracia, and we just have to take a few more steps and it should all be ok...

adventures in visa-seeking, part 3

2006-07-12T14:27:00.000+03:00

i must admit, i'm finding a little less humor and a lot more frustration in this latest trip to tel aviv for patrik's visa... but i have vented to anyone who will listen, had a relaxing neck rub, done some deep breathing exercises, and begun to take (some) proactive measures to remedy it all, so i'm feeling a little better...

ERG.

i mean... oooooohm.....
*
our appointment was early tuesday morning, and so to avoid the stress of having to catch a train at 5:30 in the morning from haifa, we went the night before and stayed at a hotel near the embassy. luckily the embassy is in a really nice part of town, very posh, on the beach, so our hotel was fancyschmancy... we had a view of the ocean adn very comfy bed and a very snazzy flat screen tv (oolala). we ate at a cute asian restaurant that night, and then slept ridiculously well until the next morning, at which point we collected all our stuff, checked out, and wrapped what we could from the free breakfast (bagels and cream cheese) up to eat later... got in a taxi and then arrived at the embassy adn stood in a few lines for about half an hour (yes, there are already lines at the us embassy at 7 in the monrning), and then finally got inside where we could sit andwait for our appointment...

the first step was to have our documents reviewed before the appointment, which was done by the same helpful israeli woman that helped me with the petition to apply for the visa a couple months ago... we started getting worried at this point, because she mentioned the required police certificate from the israeli authorities had never arrived, even though we put in the request back in may. she also looked at the translation of patrik's documents strangely, saying this was not the way people usually brought the documents in... hmm... we then went to go pay our big bucks to submit the paperwork and were asked to have a seat and to listen for our names to be called by the consul.

three hours later (at which point our bagels and cream cheese had been thoroughly devoured and our tummies were crying out for more, more, more!), the consul called her first interview (us)... just so you know, this was not the same sweet consul as last time, but a stern, unsmiling new consul... who pretty much told us that our documentation was not complete because the police record had never come and that the translation we had done by the BWC and had notarized was not valid, as the translation had to be done by a notary who spoke french and english who would then notarize his own translation... at this point my heart is sinking because suddenly i realize that although i have been anxiously awaiting this day of the interview, we will leave once again KNOWING NOTHING. and having to do MORE PAPERWORK. and having NO IDEA if it will all get done in time.

ERG!

patrik, though, is calm as can be, as this is the way things are supposed to go ,in his mind... this is how things always go, and he begins becoming proactive to solve the problem while i just want to crawl in a hole and die.

ERG!

so we leave the embassy and walk to the beach with all our documentos, where we sit in the shade long enough for me to come out of a state of shock and devestation, and begin planning our visa strategy...

in the end, the reality of the situation is that we just have to find a way to get the embassy what it needs, because of course at this point we are in way too deep adn cannot just leave it all as it is and decide to go somewhere else... we have to get the paperwork (whatever it costs) because we've already invested so much money already... sigh.

but like i said, i have vented sufficiently (ha!) to where i can chuckle (de mala gana) at the situation, and just trudge along trying to find a solution to the problem . we still don't know if we'll get it all done in time, but we're going to try.

wish us luck.

and pray that next time we go in, the nice sweet consul woman is on duty that day.

2006-07-10T09:10:00.000+03:00

do you have ANY idea how HAPPY this makes me?!?!

~*~

very very very giddy about mona and chris' wedding!!

(and totally jealous of the dress and turquoise shoes... )

a second chance

2006-07-07T11:34:00.000+03:00

in about 15 minutes i'm heading out to go translate for a group of spanish-speaking pilgrims during their visit to the archives building... i'm a little nervous, but so looking forward to it...

i've been once before... every year, staff gets to sign up to go to each of the holy places, and so i went on my staff visit earlier this year... but the day i was scheduled, i was in such a rush, and i felt so not in the right frame of mind to be going... i almost turned back to walk back home several times on the way there, but patrik was so sweet and kept saying that i should decide once we got there whether or not to go in, and that it was going to be ok... i ended up going on my staff visit that day, and was very overwhelmed by it all... everything seemed very surreal, but at the same time was making the faith so REAL, to see things that had belonged to these Holy figures... the hour flew by and i left the archives feeling so bewildered, but glad that i had gone...

today i get to go in a completely different context, and it will be so interesting to hear the stories about each of the items again (and this time, maybe i'll actually remember the stories because i'll have to be paying such close attention!), and to be there while the pilgrims go through the experience... and i'm glad i get to go again before leaving the holy land... wish me luck.

~~ 25 ~~

2006-07-06T09:05:00.000+03:00

happy birthday to me !

i'm loving this whole pilgrimage thing...

2006-07-05T17:10:00.000+03:00

first i got to see gilberto, faranak and sofia, then the stern-sapads (and somehow MISSED seeing basilisa! how is that possible?!) and now ana and andrew! pilgrimage is great for seeing old friends :) kati is in albuquerque, so i'll have to wait to see her some other time, but tonight patrik and i are heading out to dinner with ana & andrew, which should be much fun :)

p.s. these photos are about a year and a half old, and very close-up, thanks to chris zimes' kidnapping of my camera at my farewell-to-turkeyville party... by the way, congratulations to chris and mona on their wedding this weekend! yipee!!!!!

marriage class

2006-07-03T11:47:00.000+03:00

here we all are again :)

farewell dinner de antemano

2006-06-28T16:12:00.000+03:00

here we all are, el equipo eleanor, or the nimrodettes as some care to call us ;) that's eleanor, one of the coolest ladies i know, in the back with sherri, whose laugh i will miss most of all... in front is bita, who despises vegan brownies and canned fruit, and jo, who despite leading a parallel life to mine in central america, i had never met before coming to haifa... and me, grinning ear to ear cuz i finally managed to get all of us in one photo (it was quite a feat-- the batteries were dying and the waiter took the shot without really warning us... good thing we're all smiley people all the time anyway!)

so we had sherri and my farewell dinner last night, even though we have about a month left til we leave, because between bita and jo's upcoming vacations, this is the last week all four nimrodettes will be in town... so eleanor took us out to eat at a tresfancy restaurant where, in my adventurous spirit, i had "mallard with cinnamon sauce", which the waiter described as a cross between a duck and a goose. hmm. it didn't taste like fowl, but the sauce was good :D

i don't want to think about how much i'll miss them when i go... or how much i haven't learned form eleanor yet (sage that she is)... sigh.

twas a really really nice night ! when i came home, though, i learned ghana had lost, even though brazil hadn't even played that well... grr... and that patrik had had a strange awkward unfair runin with a taxi driver, which left him in a foul mood... but even so, there were flowers waiting for me when i got home. though i think, in all fairness, maybe i should have brought him some!

tonight is another departure seminar thingy by the office of personnel.. i guess leaving haifa is traumatizing to most? so far the only stressful part of leaving is not knowing where we'll be going... but only two more weeks til we know...

p.s. click on the pic to enlarge-- happy smiling faces must be seen in their fullness! ;)

much more focused today

2006-06-26T17:02:00.000+03:00

ohm.
was a bit disoriented this morning after a very vivid dream of having to drive a huge red bus with my mother and two people here from the world centre in the front seat with me, but no other passengers... in my dream i had forgotten how to drive, and the bus was going so fast and i just had to try and steer, but then we came to a toll booth and i somehow had to remember how to brake... deardeardear. stayed sleepy and disoriented til lunchtime, but after lunch got a bunch of energy and finally managed to get some work done. (yay for me!)

this sleepy/unfocused thing tho... have got to do something about it. maybe i need more iron.

(p.s. my favorite part of the picture-- the sleeping bear snuggling the globe :D )

...highly distracted...

2006-06-25T16:52:00.000+03:00

it's about 5:00 in the afternoon on sunday and i am highly distracted. have been all day. maybe i'm just tired? i've had just two small inky tings to work on today, and haven't gotten myself to do them. at all. have the documents open my computer, and i keep staring at them (or rather, minimizing the window and surfing the internet and then realizing i should be working, start staring at the screen, and then start the whole process over again...)
did manage to eat a bowlful of yummy cherries, though. :) quite a (satisfying!) accomplishment!
yum.

gana ghana (i hope!)

2006-06-22T15:33:00.000+03:00

so since ticolandia is leaving world cup germany after the first round, and cameroon somehow didn't quite make it (due to politics and prejudice, not to lack of talent, according to patrik... hmm... orgulloso? un poco!) i have come to support another small, odds-are-against-it country, thanks to the very enthusiastic crowd of ghanians at the world centre :)

ghana plays the u.s. tonight, and i have no remorse for supporting a country whose passport i do not posses over a country whose passport i do! there are about ten ghanians serving here, all who dress up in green, red and yellow to watch their country play, and you can hear them cheer three blocks away :D feels like home!

patrik and i will watch the game in the quite-crowded living room of a friend with cable, along with all the other ghanians and wanna-be ghanians, in ghana's chance to make it to the second round... it lost one game and won another, so has to win tonight (or a very lucky draw depending on how the other teams in its group play tonight)... fingers crossed {x}

visavis(a)

2006-06-20T11:56:00.000+03:00

yesterday was the second big step in patrik's visa process for the states... the first being a crazy stressful trip to tel aviv for petition for an application for a visa (ooh, yes, you have to apply to even apply... so much paperwork!!!! and money... erg.) anyway, yesterday we went to herziliya (about an hour away) for his medical exam, which can only be done at one of two doctors in all of israel approved by the embassy... getting there we didn't realize we had to transfer to another train halfway there (i'm sure the announcements coming through the speakers said as much, but speaking only three words of hebrew, we didn't quite get the message)... luckily some guy came by to check our tickets and told us we had to get off the train and go "under the ground" the the other platform to catch another train... once we got to herziliya, we gave the taxi driver the address of the doctor's office, and he spent the next 20 minutes asking all the other taxi drivers and even the central office where the street was... ends up 9 ben shalom street is this tiny little culdesac in the suburbs, so he finally figured out how to get there... at the doctor's office, patrik had blood drawn for an hiv test, a vaccination, and then we were told to walk to the x-ray place (through the neighborhood and through a construction site to a very shady looking building), where they x-rayed his chest to check for TB, and then went back to the same doctor's office for the "complete physical exam"... which consisted of the doctor asking patrik "do you have any medical problems?" "no" "good". took his blood pressure and our 350 bucks, and patrik was given a clean bill of health. hmm. seems like a money-making conspiracy between the doctor and the embassy to me, but whatever it takes to get the visa... next adventure is the actual visa interview on 11 july... send happy victory thoughts!!!!

missing the grrrs...

2006-06-19T09:02:00.000+03:00

this here is the grrs (pluralized for extra plumptiousness), cuteness catified.

trying to figure out where to go from here, and what we'll do when we get there. not much time left, just about six weeks til we board a plane to... la? abq? douala? san jose? it's out of our hands at this point, which means there's no worrying to be done, just trying to enjoy every bit of haifa and bahji while we can... we got all nostalgicos last night, realizing how much we'd miss being here. patrik especially, he's been here twice as long as me... but at the same time, we're so excited about what's to come (even the uncertainty of it all!) :D

anyway, missing the grrs and all the ones i love to hug who are an ocean away...

randomness yet again :)

2006-06-15T13:32:00.000+03:00

blog has returned from holiday, slightly refreshed :)

just to clarify, blog being on holiday was simply a reflection of my laziness to post anything, not of any holiday-taking by me and patrik! ;)

here are some random shots from the last few... days?

weeks?

months?

oh dear.

(mostly in chronological order... teehee!)

three generations

when mamita and mormor were here for the wedding, mormor was so proud to say to everyone we met "look! three generations!"... and funnily enough, we weren't the only ones :D my sweet office-mate sherri also had her mom and grandma visiting, so we took a three generations shot at the bahji visitor's centre on the 1st day of ridvan ~*~

9th day of Ridvan

with carole and matthew just a few days before na'im was born... going to see them tonight after staying away for more than a week cuz of a nasty cold that had me home sick forever...

marriage class

patrik and i are in a weekly class with other young newly-weds that discusses marriage from a baha'i perspective... we went out to dinner one night with all of them... here's arjang (persian from australia) and tazien (persian from india) sitting across from eachother, francis (philippines) and nica (persian from canada) on the left followed by shadman (persian from australia) and radostina (bulgaria)... on the right are us and leila (persian/new zealander) and shaun (u.s.)... great fun :D

el equipo eleanor

sherri, joanna and i all assist the same secretary-aide... when we're not laughing and joking around... jejeje... missing from the photos is bita, who's here for a few months to help out while replacements for sherri and me are found... these were taken at the declaration of the Bab celebration, my last holy day here in haifa (*sigh*)

also that night, managed to get a shot with yas, and shastri, quien se colo a la foto to add some ethnic flair... jejeje

faranak, gilberto and sofia were just here on pilgrimage, which was so much fun (i mean, spiritual...) and coming soon are the stern-sapads from albuquerque and then andrew and anamargarita!!! more fun to be had! hopefully faranak will post some photos on her blog (she took lots, i took none, as usual!) we did lots of stuff... zoo, beach, movies... like i said, a very spiritual time :)

2006-05-28T14:34:00.000+03:00

... blog on holiday ...

congratulations!!

2006-05-23T08:40:00.000+03:00

my dear friends sjona and jason got married on saturday!!! congratulations-- i heard it was a great party! i wish i could have been there!

~ big hugs ~

dia de la madre

2006-05-14T11:15:00.000+03:00

introducing...

2006-05-10T10:03:00.000+03:00

~*~ Na'im Mendoua Udziela ~*~

born on friday morning on the 5th of may at around 5 in the morning (05/05 at 05:00)!
mi sobrinito!

oh yeah, the bachelorette party!

2006-05-08T16:40:00.000+03:00

and so, since there is now someone to admire things like favorite rocketship underpants (or otherwise lovely underthings!), my friends threw me a bachelorette party the week before the wedding... :D

the very pink bachelorette throne :)

negar, jamak and yas...

sahba, parwane, stephanie...

joanna, carolina, emem

johanna, sherri, julie...

c'est fini!

2006-05-07T14:26:00.000+03:00

last wednesday we had our last book 6 session at our new flat with pasta dinner and happy smiling faces... or rather, "are you done YET?" faces, as seen below... i guess it was about time to wrap up the book... ;)
they say bumping heads is a sign of true love... arjang and tazien both reaching for rose petals that fell out of the prayer book :) married a few months ago!
the happy smiling faces of relieved ruhi-ers, ready to teach (or not, i guess, since we're in israel!), already planning what they will do with their now free wednesday nights! :D
and a cute pic of patrik, for good measure :)

mis familias, mis apellidos

2006-05-04T15:17:00.000+03:00

the schmitz family

(squinting)

* kitty and tony*

*erica & samantha*

familia bahamonde

(apretaditos en el sofa)

*oscar , cecilia , don~a zoila & don luis *

...pancho en la foto al fondo...

faltan marcelo y la sandra

famille nkouaga
(un peu fatigues)
*patrik, rebecca, ferdinand, carole & matthew*
(michel, betrand, abel & florent dans cameroon)

les presento mis tres familias... la primera por nacimiento, y la segunda y tercera por matrimonio :) me es extran~o tratar de explicar la conexion entre todos nosotros, cuando simplemente considero a todos como mi familia. estoy con un poco de nostalgia en estos dias, queriendo verlos a todos, pero sabiendo que seria casi imposible reunir a todos estos gringos/chilenos/cameroonianos en el mismo lugar... solo si algun dia logro comparme una linea aerea :D asi que me conformo con tenerlos en foto y pensarlos mucho... big hugs...

happy ridvan!

2006-05-03T09:41:00.000+03:00

happy (belated) ridvan everyone! here's my new siblings-in-law, carole (beyond ready to have her baby!) & matthew with us on the ninth day of ridvan :D

new blog :)

2006-05-01T08:54:00.000+03:00

this is my beeootiful seester samantha, who has now joined the blogging world!

yay!

click on the photo to link to her site :)

las sen~oras at the ridvan celebration

2006-04-28T09:12:00.000+03:00

not quite sure what was going on before they put their smiles on when they realized someone was taking their picture :D

all three have gone home now... missing them way too much...

more wedding pics :)

2006-04-25T09:06:00.000+03:00

can't quite disguise mi deseo de casarme en costa rica... jejeje... somehow turned a chilly desert setting into a tropical-ish location! :D
mami and mormor, giddy, coming up the stairs to the terrace... sweet sweet yas and patrik's casi-brother charles

*happy sigh*
helen, la mujer mas tierna del mundo, and dear shiva, muppet enthusiast who i somehow convinced to take our wedding photos! (muchisimas gracias, chiva shiva!)
aah, peter, the coolest swede i know and wedding planner extraordinaire... his terrace will soon become the most saught-after bwc wedding spot...

mormor and mr. mcjeres, who came all the way from costamcrica!la familia en bahji after the wedding :)

~~ le mariage ~~

2006-04-20T11:17:00.000+03:00

there were a million steps leading up to the terrace where the ceremony took place...
and we were half an hour late, so the guests waited and waited...
the vows...
the signing...mon belle-mère... tres leches como wedding cake...

la familia... ferdinand & rebecca (patrik's parents), the newlyweds, mormor, mamita, carole&matthew (patrik's sister and brother-in-law)....
my "bridesmaids" joanna and sherri...
le bouquet...we're married!!!
fotos en bahji...

exhausted...

2006-04-10T11:28:00.000+03:00

several days without writing.... jejeje... i'm such as bad about blogging as i am about writing...

~*~

a lot to tell, though! the wedding is just five days away (eek!) and so all the last minute things are getting done... flowers and plates and food and program (jejjee... haven't even figured out the program yet... what prayers to say, who to say them, when to do rings and vows and signing adn all that good stuff...) i get these little moments of freaking out about not having enough time, but then i realize it's all very simple and there's no reason to worry :)

~*~

saturday i moved into our new flat at the bottom of the mountain, with a beautiful view of the shrine and a very very squeeky bed. and a barking dog next door. (ha!) still unpacking, and need to get everything cleaned up and beautiful before mommy and mormor get here, or else they'll be tripping over my luggage and random bits of stuff that hasn't found a place yet... oh, and must get the hot water turned on! (hopefully today...).

~*~

and then saturday night i had my big blow out bachelorette party, complete with games and sappy advice from all the ladies and sexy lingerie (woohoo!)... i had a stomach ache when i got there, but laughed it off with all my friends... someone was taking photos, so maybe i'll be able to post them soon...

~*~

and last night i met my suegros!!!

~*~

why why WHY don't i ever think to take out my camera?...

~*~

they are very sweet and funny, and brought lots of gifts, big bright beautiful cameroonian clothes for me and patrik (and a little something for my mommy and daddy!) and some house decorating stuff and big big hugs... it's nice to see where patrik comes from :) and to see who he might turn into in thirty years! ;)

~*~

and, my days of flying under the radar and being pretty much anonymous at the BWC are over... now that i'm part of this family, there are lunches and dinners and meetings planned with house members and itc members... the whole works... i've gotten used to being an unknown face and name... no longer :)

~*~

wish my seesters were here...

inside myself

2006-04-04T14:45:00.000+03:00

with all the excitement and planning and soon-ness of the wedding, i've found that i spend a lot of time inside myself, not necessarily worrying, but definitely thinking... trying to grasp what this new life will be like, what it implies, how it will all come together. a wedding is just a day, a really nice day filled with people who love you wishing you well, but what comes after is huge. it's joining your life with someone else's, with all that implies. it's a radical change, you know? and it's so bizarre that i'm doing this for the second time.

and at the same time, it's such an easy thing. to decide to live with someone you love, that you admire and respect, to make a family, to just stick around to see what happens, no matter what. it's almost as if, if there wasn't this ritual, this ceremony, to mark the difference between before and after, that the change would just be this transitional, easy, softflowing thing.

maybe, too, it's that i've delegated so much of the wedding to friends :) it makes for a stress free existence! i just have the image of how i want that morning to be, very calm, very beautiful, very simple, and i know that if i start worrying about how many vegetable platters to get or how many chairs we need to borrow, i'll arrive that morning much too aware of the silly details and not aware enough of how unimportant those details are! :) it also means, tho, that i feel like a guest at my own wedding, which is an interesting feeling... highly recommend it!

new flat :)

2006-04-02T13:53:00.000+03:00

the (quite short) search is over -- we chose our new flat friday night... 137 hameginim will be our new home, at least for a while... we had three other choices, one of which nice with three bedrooms but was about an hour away, two on the street where patrik lives now and that were a little, mmm, strange (one was three floors DOWN, which kind of freaks me out), so the last one we looked at way at the bottom of the mountain was the nicest of all.... it has one bedroom and isn't very big, but it feels very open and has a nice view of the shrine... plus, there's an elevator (sigh of relief) as opposed to hundreds of stairs to walk up and down! :)

i'll send photos once i move in this saturday... patrik gets a key to the place the day of our wedding... hehehe

it should be nice, at least for now. hopefully we'll be able to move to a bigger or at least more centrally-located place soon... :)

and now the planning begins...

2006-03-29T11:44:00.000+02:00

so exciting! everything has been flowing really well so far... we have the date (saturday 15 april), the time (11 in the morning), the location (our friend's terrace, overlooking the mediterranean and the shrine of the bab), the invitations (on handmade paper with dried flowers... sent in the last couple days), the rings (simple white gold bands, thick and heavy), my dress (you'll see in the photos!), the food (a little bit of everything, but i'm sure delicious)... it's all falling into place... i think it's going to be a simple, peaceful, beautiful day, and one of the mellowest weddings ever... i'm really happy, very exciting, wishing for the day to come soon, and praying for a marriage that will allow us to serve, that will bring many children (gots to have da bebes!), that will last until we've got grey hair and wrinkly skin in this world, and that will continue to be a strong connection in all the coming worlds... i wish my sisters were here, so much laughing and planning and talking to be done... i miss you!

here's to a mellow morning ceremony... :)

2006-03-27T09:03:00.000+02:00

anoche tuve una devocional en mi casa en honor a pancho... fue muy linda, con mas o menos 20 personas, con una cena de tortellini con pesto, jamon, y queso ricotta, y muchas oraciones... varias personas cantaron, y fue una noche muy especial....

pase la tarde recordando a pancho en los santuarios sagrados, y llorando un poco, pero acordandome de momentos felices que pasamos, y conversando espiritualmente con el. siento que el esta bien, contento, en paz. lo siento cerca, pero a la vez en una realidad completamente separada a la de este mundo... hmm.

la pena que siento y la pena que siente su familia es tan grande, pero el tiempo ha influendiado la intensidad de los llantos, la profundidad de la tristeza... de a poco nos vamos acercando a un estado de paz.

cuatro an~os

2006-03-26T09:33:00.000+02:00

en un dia como hoy hace cuatro an~os, pancho se subio a su camioneta camino al trabajo... un martes normal, llovia con ganas y cuando salio de la casa me dijo "te le amo, chica" en ese acento cubano que le encantaba imitar... y esa fue la ultima que lo vi. se fue manejando, dejo a mi papa en su trabajo, y empezo su ruta en la autopista 11 al invernadero donde trabajaba, y a unos pocos kilometros del trabajo, perdio control de la camioneta y lo chocaron de ambos lados, matandolo instantaneamente.

esa es la historia de hoy, la historia que cambio el significado del 26 de marzo para siempre.

hay dias en que, incluso tanto tiempo despues, no me lo creo. no puedo creer que todo termino tan rapido, en un instante. mi amor, no puedo creer que ya no estas.

no puedo creer que el mundo no dejo de girar ese dia, que el sol siguiera amaneciendo, que todos nosotros siguieramos respirando...

pancho, mi amor, te extran~o tanto...

we're getting married!!!!!!

2006-03-24T08:37:00.000+02:00

aleluya!!!!

i just got a call saying that we were granted permission to marry in the holy land and for our service to continue until february 2008! i am so excited, i can barely think straight!!!!!!!!!

and now all the preparations begin!!! woohoo!!!!!!!!!!

*grin*

:)

2006-03-23T08:10:00.000+02:00

matthew & carole, my soon-to-be cun~ados!

sweet!

happy naw ruz!

2006-03-20T15:58:00.000+02:00

enjoy the llegada of the spring!

(and coffee breaks during daylight hours...

and lunch...

and sleeping in...)

: : 24 : :

2006-03-19T16:17:00.000+02:00

my eyes are all crossed and my mind completely fried, and yet i'm going back for more tonight! we got the tv show "24" on dvd, and i never watched it before, but it is so addicitive... and knowing that you can watch the next episode right away just gets you into this neverending tv-staring state... people have literally stayed in front of their tvs for 24 hours straight watching this thing... i'm taking it in four hour bursts, but even so, my mind is fried....

~~ les presento una nueva sobrinita! ~~

2006-03-17T08:47:00.000+02:00

~*~ annisa valentina, hija de mis amigos roberto y dominga ~*~

2006-03-14T13:51:00.000+02:00

now that my dreams have come back, i keep wishing for dreams that will give me answers to questions, for dreams where i can see certain people and talk to them, for dreams that tell me more about what is going on... but i've always wished that, i guess... to be psychic somehow in the dream world... jejjee... it's been nice, though, to even have everyday-type dreams though, the kind where when you wake up you're not sure if it really happened or not... the kind that give you a false memory of events that never really happened ;)

~*~

the fast is almost over, and it's gone by really quickly... it's funny how about halfway through my body just accepts the fact that there is no eating throughout the day, and goes about its normal routine como si nada... the first few days i would get these hunger pangs and these intese munchies, and now it's just like a familiar emptiness...

~*~

hable con mi suegra anoche, y fue tan rico conectar con ella despues de varias semanas... hablamos de muchas cosas, pero mas que nada de los sentimientos encontrados de la familia en relacion a mi compromiso con patrik... se que es dificil para todos pensar que estare continuando con mi vida, empezando algo nuevo, pero siempre con pancho en mi corazon, en mi mente... todavia no hayo como encontrar el balance entre la felicidad de mi matrimonio con pancho y la pena de viuda, entre tenerlo siempre en mi y empezar algo nuevo... pero de a poco creo que todo va ser mas claro, y con el tiempo las heridas se van cerrando.... nunca sanan, pero si cicatrizan...

mi deseo es que me sigan considerando parte de la familia, como yo los considero a ellos, y que puedan aceptar mi decision...

~*~

2006-03-13T07:35:00.000+02:00

i haven't posted in a few days... i think that the combination of fasting and waiting for any news from the house of justice has put me into frozen-time-mode!

friday was a big day of acquiring wedding things-- patrik and i got our rings from the jeweler, and, joyofjoys i got a dress!!!! after going into all these fancy (and kind of freaky) bridal shops (some of the dresses are outrageous... mesh netting held together by huge safety pins over a sheer bustier.... interesting...), so i went to the mall and searched for anything white... mostly there was a lot of nothing, but eventually i found the perfect thing! :D just a simple cotton strapless top and long skirt, very comfy, very dancing-naked-in-the-moonlight... makes me happy! now i can get married... jejeje

and saturday, having accomplished so much (ha!) on friday, i stayed in bed until noon and then watched the muppet show on dvd all afternoon... sigh... lazy days are dabest...

saturday night there was this really nice event organized by the africa study group here, where people spoke about enoch olinga and mr. dunbar told stories of the time he spent with him.... lots of laughing... really really nice :) plus, lots of good food :)

2006-03-08T10:40:00.000+02:00

... missing the beach...

2006-03-05T11:14:00.000+02:00

happy happy, aria!

hope you had a great day with lots of hugs and laughter and smooches from sashita!

i love you!!!!

hints of spring

2006-03-02T11:30:00.000+02:00

blossoms are popping up on bare tress... white almond blossoms raining down with the breeze on my way to work and these bright pink crabapple blossoms dancing outside the seat...

~just hints that spring is on its way~

this fasting season will be very healing.

ayyam-i-ha celebration

2006-03-01T16:14:00.000+02:00

last night, carole and matthew (patrik's sister and brother-in-law) had an ayyam-i-ha celebration at their flat... i wish i had remembered to take pictures! i'm so terrible at remembering to take my camera out-- almost every photo i've posted so far was taken by someone else and emailed to me! ~ it was a really nice night, about 39 people from all over, including some pilgrims from cameroon, so there was a lot of singing and drumming... very fun :) everyone brought lots of food (we're all stocking up for the fast, it seems like! i've had 4 different types of dessert as presents today!) and a mr. hall, a counsellor from australia, gave a little talk on the meditation during the fast. afterwards, as we were cleaning up, patrik and carole started singing to pass the time as they did the dishes, and it was so beautiful... perfect harmonies... all songs written by their family... i hope maybe one of patrik's brothers will come to the wedding, and that way there will be some amazing music surrounding us that day... there's no way to describe it until you hear it for yourself...

a man who cooks...

2006-02-28T14:21:00.000+02:00

there ain't nothin' better... :D

patrik stayed home sick today, and i when went to check on him at lunch time, he had cooked this amazing meal... a whole roasted chicken and yummy rice with veggies... mmm... que rico... (el almuerzo, malpensados! jeje)

last night i translated for the pilgrims for the first time... there are about 60 spanish speakers in this group, including flor from costa rica, mawe from panama, and vanda and tiago from chile! i was nervous, because the setup is all professional, with your own little booth and funny headphones/mic thing. and i KNOW i spanglishized several words... haha... that's life, tho!

tonight patrik's sister and brother-in-law are throwing an ayyam-i-ha party, lots of food and singing and drumming and joy :) more about that tomorrow...

did i mention lunch was delicious? :D

~ time out of time ~

2006-02-27T11:22:00.000+02:00

~*~ happy ayyam-i-ha ~*~

days of joy and sharing :)

p.s. in the spirit of joy and sharing, patrik and i went wedding ring shopping last night! and of course, in true BWC fashion, ran into baha'is at the jewlery shop... jejeje... i'm thiiis close to buying my wedding dress too (why is that purchasing things makes it all seem more real and less like we're just pretending? jeje) but am waiting on my sister's opinions before hitting the "proceed with checkout" button online!

patrik's parents have moved their trip to haifa up, and it seems like they're coming in april now instead of may... so we're looking into possible dates (that is, if we get permission)... that would be about 6 weeks from now, which is exciting and wonderful and i hope to god it could be so soon! haha.. not exactly the most patient person... :D also starting to look around at possible places...

my imagination is taking over lately, and i'm not getting ANY work done these days! jeje

more later...

2006-02-24T08:57:00.000+02:00

i've been dreaming a lot lately... falling asleep completely content and waking up in the same position i lay down in... and giggling in my sleep, talking, i'm sure, and wishing i could stay in bed when what i really need to do is get up...

when i first got here, i would have the worst nightmares... horrible anxious bloody dreams... and then i got to a point of very restful, but dreamless, sleep... it's nice to be back in the dream world again...

...and now we wait...

2006-02-23T13:18:00.000+02:00

this is about how excited we are to sit and wait for news... jejeje

so for all of you wondering how one goes about getting married in the holy land :)

fall in love (aah, so nice), get consent of parents (a little scary at first, but oh so happy after it's given!), have a meeting with the office of personnel (very official but short), and then...

wait.

and wait.

and then, on some day when you're least expecting it, you'll get the news that either:

a) yes, you're welcome to marry in the holy land and continue your service happily ever after

b) you're welcome to marry in the holy land, but please go home straight away

c) do what you like but just don't do it here!

d) (i'm sure there must be at least one other option! just can't think of what...)

and then, you get to do all the logisitical stuff like find a couple's flat to move into, contact the legal office to make sure all your papers are in order, figure out a date, start planning... :D

but until then... we shall wait.

just hopefully not too long! ;)

devocional en memoria de pancho

2006-02-21T07:19:00.000+02:00

sabado 11 de febrero, 2006

desayunito... y claveles rojos...

...there once was a blog...

2006-02-19T09:58:00.000+02:00

... that bit me in the butt... :)

owing to the excess of cheese lately (!), here are some (non-cheesy) photos for your blogging enjoyment, taken by shiva, my delightfully giggly third-culture-kid friend:

this is shiva & me

these are our toes...

that same day, lounging after a office brunch before a holy day celebration, shiva took the following series of photos, during which sherri (hilarious future-super-star officemate) and i got increasingly happy, and poor maryam, who had a migraine, got worser and worser...

ha!

~*~

p.s. to all those who have happened to come across my blog-- i'd love to know who you are! please go ahead and leave a comment, even if you don't have a blog yourself :)

~~ smileliest day ~~

2006-02-15T07:12:00.000+02:00

(...if we were roses...)

* last night, patrik proposed *

...an honest-to-goodness, down-on-one-knee,

candlelight-dinner, "will-you-marry-me" proposal...

~*~

~*~ p.s. i said yes! ~*~

~*~

2006-02-11T11:05:00.000+02:00

feliz cumplean~os, panchulo

...33...

tour virtual de mi casita

2006-02-10T16:22:00.000+02:00

this is my living room :) very spacious and bright

this is the view from the big windows... aaah, ocean.... (and those are most of my plants which, thankfully, survived the move)

i must say, the kitchen is one of the best parts... it's all very homey, wood cabinets and everything! hehehe... funny what you come to appreciate....

and this is my teensy tinesy bedroom... all that fits is my bed and a little shelf and the closet... quite cozy and tent-like... :)

i was going to take photos of the bathrooms too, but then figured i could just leave it to your imaginations... rest assured they're quite luxurious! :D

less random, more specific

2006-02-07T11:40:00.000+02:00

here's some photos i've been meaning to upload:

this is at the birth of baha'u'llah celebration-- it was supposed to be just the cameroonians, pero se colaron unos caradepalo... guess which ones don't belong in the picture! jejeje

da grrls before heading out to the holy day... i'm not nearly glam enough to be in this photo! not wearing nealy enough eye makeup to fit in with these two... :D

my flatmates faranak & anahita and my moving-out party... there were more folks in the photo (though not very many! it was the most lo-key party i've ever been to!) -- but they were all making strange eyes-half-open faces, so i cropped them out. cuter this way, anyway! jeje

~ the sweetest thing ~

2006-02-07T09:59:00.000+02:00

this morning i discovered by far the sweetest thing, and it made my soul smile...

a single wild rose waiting on my desk... for me!

aah, israel...

2006-02-05T14:32:00.000+02:00

nothing is quite as classy as having your glamourshot painted on a dinner plate...

or is as heartwarming as smoking in front of a toy store...

as joyful as two years of obligatory military service...

or as comforting as streetsigns making sure you say your obligatory prayer... before you die.

i love getting mail :D

2006-02-05T09:00:00.000+02:00

this is me & my buddy schuyler

these are our toes

~ she sent me a letter on friday ~

*
i love getting mail :D

happy randomness :D

2006-02-03T11:45:00.000+02:00

here's a random photo of yas and me trying reeeeeeally hard not to drop davidngianni's wedding cake...

even more random now that yas has appeared in my office at the world centre!

who'da thunk it?

the random happiness of meeting yas :D
*

p.s. mami, that was one of the happiest trips-- happy and hectic-- i made you come back to costa rica, even if just for a weekend, before you could forget how wonderful it is and that it's home... we should do it again... soon!

2006-02-03T10:24:00.000+02:00

~ my flatmates anahita & faranak ~

they're so sweet... when i come home from the cold windy outside, it's always warm and yummy smelling inside... sigh.

they're throwing me a moving-out party tonight... lots of dancing and laughing to be had...

twill miss living with them!

~~ dias sagrados ~~

2006-02-02T17:24:00.000+02:00

the twin holy days celebrating the birth of the Bab and the birth of Baha'u'llah came at the perfect time... it was such a nice break from going full-speed ahead with work during the day and a million activities to go to at night... i slept in, called my family, ate with my flatmates, packed for my upcoming move (woohoo!) and then went to the programmes at the seat of the universal house of justice.... even though i come here everyday, its still really special to feel at least a thousand people sitting together in the concourse, listening to prayers being chanted, and then being part of a sea of people circumambulating the shrine.... so peaceful...

aleluya!!!!

2006-01-30T09:44:00.000+02:00

happyhappyjoyjoy!!!

~*~

this saturday i am (finally!) moving!!!! so exciting... so close to work, no more taxis, no more taxi drivers yelling, no more standing in the rain!

WOOHOO!!!

2006-01-27T07:56:00.000+02:00

fellow snugglylions :)

2006-01-26T14:26:00.000+02:00

corinne, anahita, faranak & carla ... and me & patrik in our own world...!

even when all i want to do is sleep, no puedo resistir mover las caderas... my flatmates turned on some salsa last night and wanted some lessons, so after dancing with the gals, aproveche unos bailes con patrik ... who know cameroonians had such sangre latina in them ? :D

book 5 study circle

2006-01-26T10:26:00.000+02:00

i am having the best time with my study circle! we're studying book 5 (which i juuuuust finished myself, so i was a little scared of acting as tutor at first...) and we just laugh so much! we had a good class last night, focusing on skills for storytelling... and we only have one more class together... the group was put together kind of at random, so it's this beautiful assortment of folks from different backgrounds, different experiences... 'tis great :) i'm going to miss seeing them every week!

~~ que mujer! ~~

2006-01-25T13:56:00.000+02:00

aria in art--- look, she's even wearing a pink robe! jiji

i talked to aria last night, despues de tanto tiempo sin poder conversar con ella ~ it was so nice to talk and laugh and cry and then laugh again! i think the hardest thing about being far away is only being able to connect through phone and random blog entries (hehehe)... i miss saturday mornings sitting on on our blue couch with our blue&white flowery mugs drinking cafecito, looking out at all the sunvillagers, giggling like little munchkins :)

i don't think i ever expressed how amazed and impressed and proud i was of her, and how honored i was to be at the birth of sasha... it happened so fast in my mind, although for her i'm sure the minutes couldn't go fast enough!, because i had just arrived and was just getting used to seeing her with her pansota preciosa... the contractions had started already when she picked me up from the airport (que mujer!)... she was so strong, so focused, and so pleasant (as only aria can be in the most difficult situations!) throughout the whole labor, and when it came time to push, all her energy was concentrated on that one task... i couldn't stop the tears from coming when sasha was actually born (though i did have to literally stop myself from trying to catch her as she came out! soooo tempting to pretend i'm a midwife already!) and then to see aria and james lying together, cuddiling sasha just minutes after she came into this world, looking so in love with eachother and so amazed at what had just been accomplished... i was in such a daze afterwards, giving them time together with their new daughter, i couldn't believe i had just witnessed such an awe-inspiring thing!

oh, and by far, my most "que mujer!" moment was watching aria snore peacefully as they sewed her stitches... :D

...sleep... mmmm.....

2006-01-24T09:53:00.000+02:00

despues de tantas trasnochadas, anoche dormi mis ocho horas completitas... que rico....

love & babies

2006-01-23T13:35:00.000+02:00

i spoke with hoda today, who mamita asked me to talk to as a counsellor of sorts, and as someone she trusts to give me sound advice ~ hoda is an amazing woman and i truly admire her... es muy inteligente, muy capaz, muy perspicaz... me hablo sin barreras, sin censurar lo que estaba pensando, y fue una conversacion buenisima... le conte que estaba conociendo a alguien, y que mi mami me habia pedido que hablara con ella para ver lo que ella pensaba sobre los matrimonios que ocurren en el BWC... she had some very interesting things to say... she started out saying that she's spoken with several house members about this topic, and that one of them mentioned to her that the divorce rate among those who marry at the world centre is lower than that of the "outside world" (1/3 vs 1/2). not what i imagined-- i guess you just hear more about divorces that occur here, and people tend to blame having met in this surreal place as a reason for their separation... anyway, she also said it was important to analyze the person's motives for wanting to marry (both your own and the person you're considering)... which was interesting, because although i have steered clear of the obvious wife-hunters (and believe me, there are plenty of them here!), i hadn't thought what my own motives might be... for about a year now i've when i pray, or make a wish on a star or silly things like that, i always ask for "love and babies"... love and babies.... and i have often had a feeling (a nice one, at that) that even though what i'm asking for is romantic love and babies that are born of that love, that i would be amazingly happy even if the answer to that prayer was the love i recieve from my sisters and to help them with their babies. truly.

and now, as the possibility for love and babies of my own exists... i feel this bizarre mixture of peace with excitement and elation... and sadness as well, that this is a fresh start, and not the continuation of my story with pancho. i feel strange mostly for imagining a life with patrik and looking forward to it, when i was so sure before that the only future for me was with pancho. how can any of this be fair to patrik, who is so willing to love me and all my burdens and to help me carry them through life, but who may not understand just how heavy and difficult they are...

i've accepted that life isn't easy, and that darkness follows light and light follows darkness... so i'm scared, i really am, of having my wish of love and babies come true, if it can all be taken away... i'm trying to acknowledge this fear, so that i can counter it with a stronger feeling of hope...

this got long all of a sudden, i guess i had more to say than i realized ~ back to what hoda said... she said (as did mami) that time will tell if the intensity of emotion that is felt from being in this instense surreal world is real or not... she said that, because her marriage failed, she feels that the best partner is someone who you are truly comfortable, who is a good friend who supports you emotionally... she said that it's important to not marry just out of the immense pressure young baha'is feel to do so, and that, especially here, to be with someone who you would have noticed back home as well...

and then, after all her warnings and "don'ts", she said with a big smile to enjoy this, to live it fully , see where it goes, and not to worry :D

good lady, that hoda!

~*~ vida haifeña ~*~

welcome to the world, alma june!

californ-eye-ay

for more photos...

a long time coming!

happy naw-ruz!

at long last...

for sammy :)

so excited!

~*~ pancho ~*~

hmm...

all smiles :D

photos, finally

a baby story

new pics :)

~*~ joyful news ~*~

so i guess people do check this blog... :D

~*~

pics of belly

i'm becoming terrible at this...

~*~ finally, a new post ~*~

safe and sound...

leaving sooner...

smooth sailing from here on out (i hope!)

scary night ~ happy morning

~*~ sending you a birthday wish ~*~

i love fridays...

back to routine?

getting nowhere slowly?

life in limbo

weekend update

quiet day...

all is well

no, really, we're fine

all is well

paz.... paciencia...

adventures in visa-seeking, part 3

a second chance

~*~ 25 ~*~

i'm loving this whole pilgrimage thing...

marriage class

farewell dinner de antemano

much more focused today

...highly distracted...

gana ghana (i hope!)

visavis(a)

missing the grrrs...

randomness yet again :)

congratulations!!

dia de la madre

introducing...

oh yeah, the bachelorette party!

c'est fini!

mis familias, mis apellidos

happy ridvan!

new blog :)

las sen~oras at the ridvan celebration

more wedding pics :)

~*~ le mariage ~*~

inside myself

new flat :)

and now the planning begins...

cuatro an~os

we're getting married!!!!!!

:)

happy naw ruz!

: : 24 : :

~*~ les presento una nueva sobrinita! ~*~

hints of spring

ayyam-i-ha celebration

a man who cooks...

~ time out of time ~

...and now we wait...

devocional en memoria de pancho

...there once was a blog...

~*~ smileliest day ~*~

~*~

tour virtual de mi casita

less random, more specific

~ the sweetest thing ~

~~ vida haifeña ~~

~~ pancho ~~

~~ joyful news ~~

~~ finally, a new post ~~

~~ sending you a birthday wish ~~

~~ 25 ~~

~~ le mariage ~~

~~ les presento una nueva sobrinita! ~~

~~ smileliest day ~~

~~ dias sagrados ~~

~~ que mujer! ~~